There is something in me maybe someday
to be written; now it is folded, and folded,
and folded, like a note in school. ~ Sharon Olds
After a long Thanksgiving break, I’ve been having a difficult time regrouping. Of course I was still sick, but that didn’t keep me from baking pies, green bean casserole and cornbread stuffing. Of course it didn’t keep me from eating all of the above (and much more). But it does keep me from writing.
The quote comes from Goodreads.com. I find myself feeling as Sharon Olds describes – like my story lives folded up over and over inside my soul where it will remain until I find a way to spread the pages out, smoothing them flat, and fitting them together like a jigsaw puzzle. This torn edge matches that torn edge, so this scene must come after this other scene. The light will flash in my head and I will happily scribble down the story as it assembles in front of me. I’m pretty good at jigsaw puzzles. I could have this book written TODAY if someone would just give me a box full of pieces.
But, much as my battles with my waistline, I know I have to belly up to the bar (as it were) and get on with it. Talk, though, is cheap. It’s easy to say I’m not going to eat that last piece of pie, but the next thing I know, I’m sitting on the sofa with the empty pie pan and a fork. It’s easy to say I’m going to write, but quite another thing to plant my butt in the chair.
I’m off work Tuesday and Wednesday this week. My plan is to finish my Christmas shopping, and then I will write. Or maybe I’ll write first and then reward myself with standing in ridiculously long lines to buy gifts I’m not sure the recipient will love as much as I do.
I can’t promise thousands of words, but there will be some amount of progress.